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Spiderhead (2022)

 

Watch this movie. Go to your Netflix, right now, and watch this.

It's rare I pull the "command my audience to go and watch a movie" card, but I have a few reasons for doing so.

Firstly, this movie is hella creative. It's a weird, high concept movie that is DIFFERENT. I love watching stuff and thinking, I have no idea what's going to happen here. It's increasingly rare these days and to see this paired with major Hollywood talent, I just think we should all watch it to send a message. WE WANT YOU TO TRY STUFF FILMMAKERS!

Secondly, everyone on planet earth has Netflix so if you hate it it cost you exactly £0.

But I don't think you'll hate it! Because it's a good time. It's tense, and interesting, it keeps you guessing and Spiderhead is honestly just a well written, directed and acted film.

The basic premise is simple, instead of going to prison, you can go to a research facility where they test some funky drugs on you that control your behaviours. Chris Hemsworth runs the facility, Miles Teller was a naughty boy that is being tested on.

It's well worth a go, there's a few little things here and there that qualify as fridge moments (when you go to the fridge for a midnight snack later on and go... "Hey wait a minute... Why did X character do this when they could have done Y to get to Z instead?") But none of these are a big enough issue for you to not have a good time.

Chris Hemsworth and Miles Teller are awesome, they unsurprisingly standout and it's so good to see Hemsworth doing something that isn't look at me baby I've got biceps for daysss!

Spiderhead is a good time and is a 8.5/10. I'm going to do an end of year movie awards post and this is definitely a contender for "Streaming Movie of the Year".

SPIDER SPOILERS AHEAD BUT DON'T WORRY THIS MOVIE DOESN'T HAVE ANY ACTUAL ICKY SPIDERS IN IT!

Okay so the CGI on Miles Tellers car crash is a bit comedic isn't it? Must admit his ragdoll body rapidly zooming towards the camera made me laugh, I couldn't help myself.

I loved the twist of it all being to test the one obedience drug, that was clever shit and I didn't see it coming. 

I really love how they don't spell anything out too, "DarkenFloxx" is never explicitly explained as to what it is, so you can kinda speculate exactly what it's putting in your head.

I must admit one fridge moment for me was when I sat and thought about how Chris Hemsworth does not understand that putting a horny drug in someone does not mean they're suddenly in love. Surely to test the obedience one you just get a Bonnie and Clyde crime couple and try to force one to torture the other? It seems a bit round the houses to try and force people to fall in love first.

Actually, there's lots of stuff people don't like doing. Why do the torture shit at all? Just be like "Hey Dan (in this world I'm a prisoner, I got arrested for public urination or something), eat this cucumber!" And I, a man that does not enjoy cucumbers, would be like, nah mate, but then you hit me with obedience drug and I gobble that cucumber up.

Whoever is funding this project I can't help but think is horny.

I mean, think about it. We see like four or five drugs being tested, and they're all like horny, or fear, or pain, or obedience, it's all got a slightly BDSM undertone to it.

Or maybe the funder is like hey Hemsworth make control drugs for people, but Hemsworth is horny so it just has a horny sheen over it?

I got distracted again.

Tell you what, I didn't care at all about Miles Tellers girlfriend, his alive one or his dead one. Sorry Miles, I was just like, ah whatever. Although! I did find the twist about her being in there for baby murder a bit compelling.

His dead girlfriend though? Not bothered. Why you getting in a car with a very drunk man as the driver? That's on you. Also, the only people that died in that crash had their seatbelts on, so is the message of the film don't wear a seatbelt? That seems... Wrong.

Oh and my lord when the DarkenFloxx made that lady do a suicide, good heavens! The dramatic tension in that scene, Mama Mia! Very good stuff.

The ending was good, I like that they didn't leave the door open to a sequel like so many movies want to do these days, they're like look Hemsworth is dead and that's that.

I do wonder what kinda life Teller and his girlfriend will live now though? On the run with this absolutely wack story behind them, I hope they find peace and don't do any more baby murders or drunk drives.

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