Man did I dislike this. It just is all so tired, and boring, and it's weird and just makes me so sad because no one else makes dinosaur movies because of this franchises refusal to just die!
I'm so angry I'm not even gonna make a job about why it should be "extinct!"
2/10 don't watch it don't waste your time it sucks it has one good scene, just YouTube it.
SPOILERS I HATE JURASSIC WORLD!
Alright so first off, this movie is long as balls! At least it feels it! I couldn't believe it was still going on at points!
Thet bring back all the old actors so that people nostalgic for the 80s will come see it. They do very little and they all look sad to be here.
Okay so first off Blue. I hate Blue. I hate that Blue had a baby with itself, I hate that they pretend this stupid dinosaur can understand Chris Pratt, it seems grateful at the end to Pratt for bringing it back, my brother in Christ for all you know Chris Pratt is the person that took it!
Ian Malcolm has an interesting job doesn't he? He is a lecturer at a place doing things he HATES, his lecture is like "you're all the worst, you're going to singlehandedly end the world, STOP doing what you are doing for all that is holy!" And then the kids all stand and applaud and ask for book signings! WHAT IS HAPPENING?!
The bad guys plot is hilarious. The bad guy is a guy doing a Mark Zuckerberg impression, and he's like okay, so let's make special crops, and then release all these giant locusts that will eat all the crops that aren't ours. Yeah it'll end human existence but we will make money on our crops! And surely NO ONE will immediately realise that the dinosaur period locusts don't eat the crops from the place doing DINOSAUR research! No, only fucking Sherlock Holmes could put this together!
I HATE the creepy girl that is a clone and is basically her own mum. I hate they try and make it emotional. It's not relatable at all it's weird why did you do this in a fun franchise about dinosaurs! JUST GIVE ME DINOSAURS! I don't want this!
Also! Stop it with your stupid laser, where you point it at a person, then the dinosaur will hunt that person til they're dead. If you want to point something at someone that will kill them, buy a gun!
ALSO! I love the idea that Chris Pratt escapes the dinosaurs hunting him, but they never stop, so in like 5 years he's having his dinner and one just busts through the window like "FINALLY GOT YA!"
The dinosaurs go out their way to be rude, which isn't how animals typically are. The humans on our side are totally invincible and outrageously plot armoured, it's actually laughable at points.
The one decent scene is the chase scene in Italy, it's just fast paced and fun. But not enough to make this thing worth seeing.
The worst part is, this could've been interesting. At the end of the last film, they set up an interesting question, what if dinosaurs busted out and just lived in our world? We get about 5 minutes of exploring that interesting concept before it's just the same old nonsense.
I grew up loving dinosaurs. Jurassic World made me grow to hate them in movies.
LET THIS FRANCHISE DIE FOR ALL THAT IS GOOD!
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